Being a mom and a wife comes with many responsibilities; by adding in a career and my desire to succeed personally and professionally, I always put myself on the back burner. I had trouble understanding how to create a work-life balance.
There has never been a time in my life when I was not busy with a million responsibilities that I had to handle all my own. I realize now that I lacked the skill of balancing life and a career. I was taught to work hard for what I wanted, and the rest would come later. As women, we are taught to handle so much and to be the support system for everyone, but we lack the support when it comes to ourselves.
Life has a funny way of making you pause and self-reflect. I realized this when I noticed that my mental health started to affect my physical health. I was eating well and exercising, but it was not enough. It was no longer just the physical exhaustion; I was mentally and emotionally exhausted. I knew it was time for a change, and I was left wondering how I would learn to balance work and life and still feel like I had succeeded personally and professionally.
The first step was to acknowledge I was taking on too much and needed change by reprioritizing, unplugging, finding serenity, and creating balance through organizing, and scheduling.
Reprioritizing
•I started by removing tasks and responsibilities that were not lucrative to my personal and professional growth.
•Accountability: I could not do it alone. I needed a mentor or an accountability partner to help me focus and implement this change. I signed up for a life coach who would hold me accountable and help me through my growth processes.
Unplugging
•I set time to unplug from social media and avoid using digital or electronic devices.
•Completing a digital detox. I had to learn to relax and do nothing, even if there were things to do.
•Muting email and phone notifications.
Saying No and asking for help
•Learning the word, NO!” I had to learn to be all right with letting go and saying NO.
•Asking for help! I realized that I did have support and it was acceptable to ask for help. Unfinished tasks: Being fine with not completing all my tasks. It will get done. Why stress? Just unplug and rest.
Organization and scheduling
I needed to get better at organizing and scheduling time to leave room for me. We all know the saying, "there are not enough hours in a day," so why try and do everything? Some things can wait for another day. •I had to learn not to overschedule myself. I learned to be honest and realistic about what I can and cannot do.
•Learning to prioritize tasks more efficiently. I created a to-do list to keep things in order by priority and leave room for unexpected changes.
•Learning to segment my day for work, home, and school helped make my tasks more manageable.
Finding serenity- Learning to be calm, peaceful, and untroubled
•I learned to stop and enjoy life. It is gratifying to have fun!
•I started doing things that added peace and value to my life!
•I was excited about taking control and doing things with a purpose.
•Enjoying time alone; I learned to be all right with doing things alone.
•Bucket list: I created a list of things I’ve always wanted to do, and I plan to just do it!
Through this rollercoaster of a personal journey, I grew to understand I just needed to take the first step and that there is never a correct way to create work-life balance; however, I can stop and take a deep breath and just breathe. I understand now I can't do it all! But I must remember to prioritize self-focus, self-care, and loving myself because it all starts there!
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